Drugstore Cowgirl

One of my better friends is courting a girl that needn't be courted. I have never met her but his stories are absurd. First, she was disappointed that she did not have the time to pop some percasetts nor dilaudid before seeing a movie.. or as a last resort, sneak in a bottle of Jack.

She asked him to attend a fund raiser for the victims of the Katrina hurricane. She told him that there would be lots of finger foods and an open bar for 40 bucks a head. Probably, the classiest part of her proposition would probably have been the part when she told him that she usually has to safety-pin a note to her sweater before attending an open bar. The note would contain writings of her address so someone, anyone, can wheel barrel her home when she gets influenced by overwhelming alcoholic toxins.

I asked him how he felt about this. To my surprise, he answered that he thought it is good for two reasons. One, is that she will be more “available” when she gets trashed.. and two, now he will finally know where she lives.

Maybe cupid drank some 80 proof.